Good writing, with a strong point and with life oozing out.

An Open Letter

January 30, 2006

Dear Person Who Parks Their Stupid Car Right In Front of the Door to the Laundromat:

Hey, how’s it going? I know that we don’t talk like we used to, and I’m sorry for that. My bad.

I guess I should start by saying how much I like you. Really! More than you know! I promise, I feel a real affinity with you and I have a deep respect for you and the life you lead. A reverence, really, as you struggle against the man. You know the man, right? He’s that guy who makes sure that there’s way more washers than dryers. The guy who comes on Monday afternoon to noisily collect his quarters. The guy who reaps rewards from our scarcity.

Where was I? Oh, yeah: at the entrance. I guess I got off track there, because my concern really has nothing to do with me or the other souls who share this space. Oh, sure, we’d have a hard time simply walking to the door, much less carrying our giant parcels of laundry in. Which is, if I may say, well nigh impossible.

Sorry. Off track again. My concern is actually for you. I can’t even imagine the difficulty you yourself have in wrangling your baskets through the constrained aperature of your car door, kicking it shut, and then side-shuffling between the building and your car to get to the door. So why bother? Why not heed the fricken’ NO PARKING signs and simply put your car into one of the more conventional parking spaces? I know, you’ve probably been coming here a lot longer than me. And someday I too will indulge in the great honor of looking out at my car right outside the window. It’s pretty sweet, I bet.

Very Sincerely Yours,

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4 Responses to “An Open Letter”

  1. Greta Davies says:

    At least you’re not bitter, Mike. :)

    But seriously, what is it with selfish people who have an apparent lack of understanding that they share the world with other people? Some people seem to have not moved past the stage of a two-year-old who doesn’t realize that they are actually NOT the center of the universe. Lump the car guy in with group of teenagers who stand in front of the entire candy bar section in Woolworths oblivious to the fact that I’m trying to get a Twix bar, and with the women who walk side by side down the sidewalk at a snail’s pace, making it impossible for anyone to get by, and with people who pull up right outside my door with their bass booming so loudly that it shakes my windows and wakes my children. I don’t think they’re trying to be rude, they just don’t have a clue. I feel sorry for them, really. And thankful for them that they teach me grace and patience.

  2. kate says:

    Arggghhhhh. Entitlement! (blocking door guy)
    This very morning, I was thinking, “Don’t you know you’re not supposed to lean against the metro pole when it’s the only one I can reach, or rudely cut your car in front of me in traffic, which is especially today since it’s raining? I DESERVE BETTER!” Then I realize that, actually, I’m also feeling entitled.
    I’m not sure what to do with that.

  3. P3T3RK3Y5 says:

    i felt the caring. your sensitivity touched me.

  4. yomama says:

    I can’t agree morre with your expression of encrochment! You go, man!

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