Good writing, with a strong point and with life oozing out.

Propriety

November 15, 2005

Things to bring to Home Depot:

1. a can-do, creative attitude
2. comfortable shoes
3. old jeans (ideally on your person)
4. a tape measure clipped to the front right pocket of the aforementioned jeans (whether or not you need to measure anything).

Things not to bring to Home Depot:

5. a tiny, pretty dog
6. (sheesh)

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6 Responses to “Propriety”

  1. kate says:

    I had a scary realization recently — I am beginning to see the light. To know of what you and Gospel Matt speak. To see, hear, feel … maybe not so much taste and touch … the wonders of Home Depot.

  2. Anonymous says:

    Lily and I just listened to Laundry Mat. Her question is, “what are granny pannies and why does uncle Mike need them?” Feel free to respond at your convenience.

  3. Rebecca says:

    I always feel kind of cool going into hardware and Home Depot-like stores when I have my paint clothes on and my hands have 5 different colors of paint under my nails. I feel like I’m a part of a secret club that girls aren’t usually allowed to be a part of.

  4. kate says:

    After reading this again, I’m wondering — what, in Mike’s mind, constitutes a “pretty” dog?

  5. good question, Kate–

    a dog which is less than 10 inches tall, has styled hair, and a bejeweled collar.

    I wanted to say “toy dog”, but thought that might be confusing.

    right on, Becky–

    but how do you clip your fancy laser-guided micrometer/tape measure to your right front pocket?

    nice try, anonymous–

    but you know full well what granny pannies are. I’m not asking you to explain them to my kids, so don’t try to shove your parental responsibilities onto me. ;-) Tell my beautiful niece that I was only watching other people’s panties.

    Umm, or maybe not.

  6. Maggie says:

    I read somewhere that “small dogs are a chic accessory”.

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