I’m afraid we crossed the event horizon today when we stepped over the threshold of the Apple store. A pair of angels opened the double doors for us, and the Spirit of the Lord hovered just inside the entrance. Time slowed down as we breathed rarified air, floating along and touching absolutely everything while checking specs and prices. IPods, 30-inch monitors, speakers, software, and about a hundred computers beckoned us to give up our old, tired way of life and come toward the light.
The salesguy sagely pointed us toward a lower-end laptop, even as he described the valuable features of the other models. My eyes started glazing over, until he nonchalantly walked me toward a dual-monitor, PowerBook-powered setup. When he drug a window from one monitor to the other one, I actually felt my heart skip a beat. I wouldn’t have been more impressed if he had shown me the birth of a star, or created energy.
The clincher came at the end, when he found out that I am an Adjunct Professor at a prestigious local university. This apparently entitles me to a substantial discount on everything, plus a full rebate on the purchase of an IPod. Lord, have mercy.