Good writing, with a strong point and with life oozing out.

“I” dolatry

August 30, 2005

I’m afraid we crossed the event horizon today when we stepped over the threshold of the Apple store. A pair of angels opened the double doors for us, and the Spirit of the Lord hovered just inside the entrance. Time slowed down as we breathed rarified air, floating along and touching absolutely everything while checking specs and prices. IPods, 30-inch monitors, speakers, software, and about a hundred computers beckoned us to give up our old, tired way of life and come toward the light.

The salesguy sagely pointed us toward a lower-end laptop, even as he described the valuable features of the other models. My eyes started glazing over, until he nonchalantly walked me toward a dual-monitor, PowerBook-powered setup. When he drug a window from one monitor to the other one, I actually felt my heart skip a beat. I wouldn’t have been more impressed if he had shown me the birth of a star, or created energy.

The clincher came at the end, when he found out that I am an Adjunct Professor at a prestigious local university. This apparently entitles me to a substantial discount on everything, plus a full rebate on the purchase of an IPod. Lord, have mercy.

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4 Responses to ““I” dolatry”

  1. kate says:

    Nice title!
    And, how have you resisted the pull thus far? I, fortunately, am immune to that particular siren song, but I have been with those who have fallen on their knees in worship at the portal of that very store. (well, if you went to the one at Courthouse, anyway. Which you probably didn’t.)

  2. This just in:
    one of the iPolice just let me know that it should be “iDolatry”, as in “iPod” (which I also screwed up…). I’m sure that a proper computer would have caught this error.
    Nope, it was Courthouse. If there’s another portal, I’d really rather not know.

  3. sonja says:

    Oh … the portals are many, and dangerous. There is one in Tysons … the tractor beam of which is strong at least for the members of the LightFamily.

  4. John Musick says:

    Mike, don’t resist.

    Step in the light of macintosh.

    Colors are brighter,
    Words mean more,
    The air smells sweeter.

    Don’t allow the PC purgatorians sway you.

    Free youself my friend.

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